Stairway to Hell

I went out to a bar tonight in downtown Indianapolis for a friend's birthday. I attempted to park in a mall garage just a block from my destination. But the city had other plans.

As I approached downtown I noticed a lot of motorcycles. Many more than usual. Then I noticed some streets were blocked off. And they were filled with motorcycles! Like the entire main thoroughfare of downtown was closed and filled three rows deep with bikes for probably a mile! It was a neat sight, but highly inconvenient because of what that event, along with the GenCon festival/conference or whatever it is, did to parking. I pulled in to the garage a block from the bar, but once underground, I had to follow a maze of ramps and turns since everything was full. This garage is seriously like the Catacombs of Indy. Once down there, you could end up literally several city blocks away from your entrance because it apparently covers the entire area of the city! I was fully two more city blocks away when I exited the garage onto the street.

That's the other thing. The stairwell to get from the garage to the street looks like a place people get murdered. I should have taken a photo, but I just wanted to get the heck out ASAP.

I safely exit the garage, walk a half mile to the bar, and enjoy my evening. At 11 p.m. I'm ready to go. I head back the the stairway of hell alone in the city at night. But walking the city streets alone was not a concern. Friday nights downtown are filled with people and lights, especially with all those bikers down there. It was purely the stairwell that worried me.

As I approached the stairway door, I tried to recollect those articles in Cosmo about protecting yourself, and the best I could do was getting my keys positioned in my hand in such a way that I could more easily use it as a weapon.

There was a homeless man standing near the door, and as I pulled on the handle and realized it was locked, I asked him if he knew why it was locked...because a. The homeless in Indy are like our ambassadors and b. I apparently like to ask strangers stupid questions.

He had no answer, and luckily the restaurant next door was still open, so I was able to get access to the mall through there, and get to the garage from the mall.

I get down to my level, and it's empty of people (witnesses) except for one car with dark windows blasting what I'm certain is devil-worshipping music. And since I've come in a new way, I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE IM PARKED.

I wander around, trying to beep my horn with the keychain, and eventually pull up google maps to try and ascertain where I currently am in relation to where the scary stairway dumped me on the street. As I find my way, the devil music is now in motion, sounding as if it is pursuing me. I walk faster, key-weapon cocked and ready.

And they turned and drove away. And I got in my car and left.

Welcome to my worry-filled brain, folks.

On the positive side, I had a fun night, and really enjoyed walking the streets of this lovely city and feeling the energy of the crowds out tonight. I just do not enjoy underground parking garages late at night by myself.


  1. LOVE it. Well, not the fact that you were scared, but love the way you described this situation. I felt as though I was right there with you!

    If it makes you feel any better, I am the exact same way.


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